Monday, February 10, 2014

Honesty is the BEST policy!!!!!

Yeah, I’m gunna be 100% honest with you right now. This week was…uhhhm…pretty crappy? Yeah, that’s the best way I can put it. I don’t want to just write about all the great things happening because I’m still human, I still have really bad days & I still get discouraged just like the average joe. To kinda give you a better idea of why this week wasn’t the best:

Monday- didn’t meet with a single person.
Tuesday- didn’t have any lessons.
Wednesday- the one lesson we DID have planned….cancelled.
Thursday- the family we haven’t seen in like 2 weeks since they came to church cancelled on us..
Friday- yeah…I think you get the point by now.
It just was a very slow, rough week.

Now that I’m done with my negative-nancy rant I must tell you that there WAS good in my crummy week :) there always is!

I experienced a few of my “first as a missionary” kind of things.
1. I had to walk around and try to talk to people in the rain for the first time! It was such a blast. You’d think that people would feel bad for you walking around in the cold wet atmosphere and let you in, but no :) it made me feel like a TRUE missionary though lol. Oh, and back story: California is in some state of a drought and has been for a while. So the prophet of the church asked all the members in southern cali to fast on fast Sunday (feb. 2) for rain…and by golly, the Lord handed us some rain :) we aren’t like out of the drought or anything, but He sure did hear our prayers!

Don't pay attention to my awkward feet!

2. I left the apartment without my missionary tag for the first time. Or so I thought. Come to find out it was in my scripture bag the whole time -_- I felt so…naked…there..i said it..without it. I felt like a normal person, because I looked like one for the first time in a while and I did NOT like it. I like being a missionary :) 

While we were at district meeting this week our district leader asked what some of our problems as missionaries were. I, obviously, said comparing myself to others. He very boldy said (and take note of this everyone) “You literally CRIPPLE yourself when you compare yourself. Everytime you go to compare yourself you need to CATCH yourself.” So true. Heavenly Father just expects us to do our best, then He makes up for the rest.
Also, we got on the topic of how it’s a litttttle (more like very) awkward to talk to EVERYONE, since that’s what we are supposed to be doing and all as missionaries. Then by the end of it I had realized this though: The Lord places people (even ones that are uninterested and mean) in our path to see if He can even trust us to talk to everyone. If He can’t trust us to do that, how can He trust us with those who ARE ready? We must talk to EVERY one. It’s just part of it. We have to find people that He has been preparing because He has.

Sunday came and all the members kept coming up asking us “so do you have anyone coming to church today?!” and I felt soooooo pathetic saying “” it made me feel horrible because I knew in my heart we had worked our butts off to try and find people this week to teach and bring but yet it looked like we had just slacked off and been lazy. Well, I saw that jenna (our recent convert) was outside so I went to help her and when I walked out I saw George, her husband and ALL the kids there. George has NEVER come to church. He hasn’t even ever been open to the idea! Now the whole entire family was there!!! I was shocked. We walked in, sat down and I looked at bishop and just started to smile so big my face hurt…that shortly turned into tears and I could hear Heavenly Father say “See Katie. You have GOT to start trusting me. I promise you I know what I’m doing.” George loved church and Jenna was so happy to have her family there with her supporting her in what she knows is true. It ended my so called “crummy” week on the best note ever.

I know that I am going to have really good weeks. I also know that I’m going to have extremely hard weeks. But I’m thankful that the Lord trust me with all the trials He puts before me. I am thankful that He gives me opportunities to learn and to grow into the Katie Toolan He always knew I could be. I am thankful for the bad times..they make you more grateful for the good. I know this church is true. I know that the world is evil and crazy but with the gospel of Jesus Christ in our life we can get through it all; we can even do it with a smile on our face :)
I love giving gifts.....

But you gotta be on a budget....

sister toolan
Still taking selfies!!!!

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