Lots of "LASTS"

Twas a week filled with lots of “lasts” on the mission. 

Monday- Honestly this day was a little rough. HOWEVER. Through the midst of all the hardness, I was able to recognize the many many many tender mercies the Lord was sending my way. He is so good to me. Always. Even when I don’t deserve it. Because He always loves us. No matter what. 

Tuesday- I woke up in some serious pain. I laid in fetal position on my bed for like an hour HA. So pathetic.  It was my last Zone Meeting to attend on my mission and they stinkin’ made us sing ‘God Be with You til We Meet Again’ as the closing hymn. HOW RUDE! Hahah. It’s safe to say that I cried through the whole song. BOO. We found 2 new investigators this day and got in contact with someone we’ve been trying to for a while. 

Wednesday- I finished the Book of Mormon for the 3^rd and last time on my mission :) I love that book. It brings so much guidance, peace, comfort and direction to my life. It has for sure strengthened my testimony in the Savior too. We went to Squash Farm again and worked our tails off.

Proof of how hard we worked....dirt!

It was funny because all the elders there kept taking breaks, ‘using the bathroom’ and getting water. Aka: doing whatever they could to get out of work. Sis Brentlinger and I never stopped once. Oh, silly elders. How ya gunna let the sisters out do you like that? :p When we got home dirt was falling out of every place possible. It felt nice to take a shower and get clean ha.

We taught a 15 min Law of Chastity lesson that day. (if you don’t know what the Law of Chastity is….ask….your mom?? Hahah) It was the funniest Law of Chastity lesson I’ve ever taught. There is seriously NEVER a dull moment on the mission :) 

Thursday- We were on exchanges. My last exchanges on the mission. Blah. I was with Sister Wall in the YSA ward for the day and it became very clear to me as to why I never served in a YSA ward hahah. 

Sister Wall

Awkward encounter #1: while sitting down this guy rides up on his bike asking what’s up. He tells us he’s going around trying to find his future wife, then proceeds to ask us if we’d like an application….hahah. we changed the subject always, then at the end he asked if he could get our number so we “could talk about Jesus and stuff” but once we told him we could get him the ELDERS number he quickly declined and was on his way hahah.

2^nd one: we went up to this kid and he just kept saying “I do drugs. Do you have drugs?” hahah. Eventually we got him to take the survey we were doing and once we gave him a #BecauseHeLives card he legit pulled the front of his pants open and shoved it down. He ended the convo by saying “I do drugs. HAIL SATAN!” hahaha. Later we were talking to other people, he walked by again and screams “THEY GAVE ME DRUGS. DON’T TALK TO THEM!” hahaha. I love meeting people out here :) pyschos and all!

We got hit on all day. It was. Uncomfortable. And so beautiful hahah. I wasn’t super awkward every time it happened though which gave me a little bit of hope that I won’t be COMPLETELY weird when I get home. 

Oh, I got asked to be Isaiah and Sarahs babys God Mother hah. Cool stuff. 

Friday- We had homemade ice-cream at dinner which made me miss home! I love me some good ole’ chocolate homemade ice-cream :) 

While visiting someone that day they made the comment of “yeah, we’ll see who you are once you don’t have that lil name tag on anymore” and I say appalled. It motivated me to TRULY always be the person I was here on my mission instead of being a “one hit wonder” so to say. 

Saturday- Finally took a picture with my library buddies!

We went to a baptism in Lucerne so Sis B could play piano for them. It was such a great experience. As the teenager was baptized his non member brother got up after to bear his testimony of a sort and in it said “you know, now you got me thinkin’ about baptism brotha. I think I want to be baptized!” how sweet?

That night at dinner (with the Sleds) Sis B and I got sooooooooooo tickled at one point. They are hilarious people!!! Chase goes “Uhmmm…does anybody else notice the sisters are down here like dying??” hahhaha. My tummy hasn’t hurt that much from laughing in a looooong time. It was much needed :) 

Sunday- WARNING: THIS IS GOING TO BE LONG BECAUSE I WASN’T ABLE TO WRITE IN MY JOURNAL ABOUT THIS DAY SO I’M PRINITING OFF WHAT I WRITE TO TAPE INTO IT. :)

Hm. So things were going fine. We woke up and Sister B wasn’t feelin’ so hot, she had like a head cold type thing, but life proceeded on. After our morning full of studies and meetings we finally started church at 1. While the Sacrament was being passed I started to get really hot and dizzy. I finally looked at Sis B and said “uhm. We might have to get up and go to the bathroom. I think I’m getting sick” she goes “yeah, just let me know when.” And I very quickly was like “UUUH. Now. We need to move NOW.” Haha. Thankfully Heavenly Father helped me not to get sick until I was IN the bathroom. I felt awful. I didn’t want to go back in the chapel just incase I went to get sick again. We sat in the foyer. I had a little wet towel on my neck trying to cool myself off. A woman in the ward walked by and asked how I was and I just went to bawling….you know…women problems n all….hahah I told her “You know. I’m just really frustrated because satan is doing everything in his power to get me to stop working and I’m so over it. I only have 3 weeks left and I don’t want to be stuck inside sick.” So here I am, a hot mess, and then all of the sudden we hear over the microphone “At this time I would like to invite one of my favorite people up to bear her testimony.” Sis B and I immediately looked at one another. We KNEW where it was going…and we were right….he went on to say “I would like to invite Sister Toolan to come bear her testimony because she is leaving us soon. She is one of the best missionaries I have ever seen in my lifetime. Not to say the others weren’t , but she’s just an incredible missionary. She comes over to our house often and is very close with our family. She has helped us through some really hard times.  I love that sister like a daughter. We are fortunate to have her and we are very sad to have to let her go. Without further or do..Sister Toolan..” I go from crying, feeling pathetic and worthless to putting a smile on my face, praying and praying that I won’t get sick up there in front of everyone hahah. Im thankful Heavenly Father blessed me with the talent of being able to “fake it til I make it” haha. 

After Sis B and I got priesthood blessings and were counseled to go home and rest. So we did. We slept 2:30-8…then took NyQuil and slept thru the night hahahah. I was also counseled in my blessing to keep being of good cheer, so later while I was still sick and miserable I realized I had only ate 3 crackers the whole day…I took the counsel to heart by telling myself “Hey, this is a really good way to lose weight! YAY!” HA.  I was so weak haha. At one point when I was cleaning my sickness up I got annoyed and said “dang it! Why can’t my mom be here to clean this up for me right now!??!!” hahaha. I’m glad that day is over.

Ok, I’m done boring you. Love yall. See you way too soon :(

-hugs-

Sister Toolan

Happy Easter Y'alllllll!!!!!!!!

Hm. This week? LOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG week. We worked hard and lots of great things happened, but I can’t believe all these things happened only a few days ago…seems like foreverrrrrr. It’s probably because the whole week I was fasting naps (she means she was going without naps to show obedience). We had just fasted (food wise) that week and I didn’t want to starve myself so I gave up an item that I knew would prove to Heavenly Father that I wanted to show Him what I was willing to give up to be more in tune and sensitive to the spirit during conference. It totally helped. I LOVED conference.

Monday- for zone activity with all the missionaries we had a late birthday party for and elder and I. It was a ton of fun and put me on a sugar high for the rest of the day haha. We had dinner this night with a family in the ward who had never fed us the whole time I’ve been here. They were a powerhouse couple. I felt the spirit like crazy in their home which made me really grateful they live their lives in such a way that it radiates around them. My favorite part was that they said the opening AND closing prayer. A lot of times people ask the two missionaries to say the two prayers when we go to their home, but for me, I like to hear other people pray. I like to hear the things that concern them, are on their minds, are troubling them..it’s a good learning opportunity for me.

A woman in the ward asked us to give her like 20 #BecasueHeLives cards because she had already handed out the 5 we gave her. She ain’t scuuured! Speaking of which. Yall need to watch this if you haven’t, watch it again if ya have, and share it like crazy.

Tuesday- This night we were on our way to visit someone and in the process we were passing by a house to a potential investigator so I was like “eeh, won’t hurt. Lets just stop by really quick and invite them to the ward party this weekend!” so we did and it was PERFECT. She had just found out that a family friend has passed away so we were able to teach her a little of the Plan of Salvation (such a happy and wonderful plan :D) and also her kids weren’t home so we actually allowed us to come in for once. After showing her the #BecauseHeLives video she said her favorite part was that “it was all true and made sense” :)))) aaah. The whole thing just gave me testimony that we, as members, feel the spirit all the time (if worthy) it’s just our natural instinct so we don’t think of it as the spirit. I didn’t have this huge prompting like “we NEED to go see her” it just made sense to and BAM. We feel the spirit. It’s in us.
Sister Brentlinger has been laughing like me, she even accidentally snorted this day. I am wearing off on her! Hehe.

Wednesday- I had one of my first “freak out moments” about going home. I got my little “leaving” invitations in the mail from momma and it HIT. Hard. I just started bawling like a baby. Sis B didn’t know what was happening or what to say so she just laughed hahah. I found out later in the week that another sister that’s going home with me had a freak out moment as well this week, so it must just be going around :p

Had a lesson with one of our teenage investigators and while teaching him about the Word of Wisdom we showed him how to remember what 5 things God asks us not to partake of by using CATTS. Coffee Alcohol Tea Tobacco and Substances (drugs). After going over it a few times we asked him to tell us what they meant…here is our conversation:
Me: ok…what’s C stand for?
Him: oh. CRACK!!!!
Us: awkward silence trying not to laugh…… “no. try again.”
Him: Cocaine????....oh coffee!!!
Us: ok..what about A?
Him: for some reason I keep wanting to say..apples???
Us: ………….oh goodness.
Later on…………..us: what about S?
Him:silence……..
Us: suuuuuuub……
Him: (very confidently) SUBWAY!
Me: dude, comeon! God doesn’t have any problem with you eating Subway! Hahahahaha.
We all laughed for a good while. It was a hilarious moment on the mission, that’s for sure :)

We felt prompted to go randomly visit our recent converts and while there (feeling uncomfortable given the situation) their non member cousin gave us a referral to go visit someone! WHOA. Super cool. Never happens.

Thursday- Got to jump on a trampoline for a little while with Ashleys kids after a fab dinner at her house :) it was a gorgeous day. Practically perfect.

Friday- Had the ward Easter Egg Hunt and it was a hit. We had a ton of people show up and have a good time. I love this ward. Such great people. It was a tough day though. We had a ton of people open up to us, confide in us and tell us of some serious issues they’re having. It broke us for a little. Sister B had to talk someone out of committing suicide on the phone for an hour. It was just an overwhelming night. We got through it though. Only with the help of such a loving Savior.

Saturday- while watching conference I found proof that little kids listen to and benefit from conference even when we don’t realize it. Sister Moffetts granddaughter was sitting at the computer playing but each time, even SUPER into the game, when a prayer would begin (without us telling her) she would stop, bow her head and listen. It was a great thing for me to witness so that one day when I have kids I don’t give them the excuse that they’re too young or something. THEY LISTEN. CONFERENCE IS FOR EVERYONE.

Sunday- it was Easter. Sorry I forgot to wish yall a Happy Easter last week. I know. I’m awful. So forgive me :p SO HAPPY LATE EASTER! We went on a hike with a member family (it’s tradition for them) at 6 in the morning and right when I walked in and started talking - one of the guys goes “SEE. I tollllllld you sister Toolan would be happy and full of life even at 5:45 in the morning!” hahah. I guess I’ve learned to love mornings :p the hike was gorgeous. Powerful testimony was shared.

Watched conference. Watched more conference. Had an Easter dinner at a families house and built the Lego set of “The Last Supper” it was SICK! I enjoyed conference wayyyyyyyyyyy too much. I received so many powerful answers to deep questions I had. I was so grateful he gave me those :)

GOOD NEWS: after a long week and lots of crazy events that I can’t even begin to tell you on here I was in the shower praying (like I DO!) and it hit: my brain/heart/body can’t take this much longer. I have worked my tail off for 17 months now. I’m tired. I’m worn out. I keep fighting, but God let me in on a secret that my time is coming to an end and it’s much needed. Heavenly Father gave me so much peace about coming home. I see things a little differently now. I’m still nervous, still excited in ways and sad in others. But I completely get it now.

Wow. Long week. Sorry for the overflow of info. Love yall.
-hugs-
Sister Toolan

Two Katie's??????

The Fairferlicks - I had to say bye to them this week because they're going out of town and won't get back till I go home:(

I don’t know how I keep forgetting to tell yall this but both Sister Brentlinger and I are “Katies”. The even better part is that we were both given names at birth that we were never called. Hahaha. 

A strange thing happened like two weeks ago. At the beginning of my mission it was a struggle to not sing “worldly music” especially when we’d go somewhere that’d be playing it. Then the middle of my mission came and it was almost like I just didn’t even hear it anymore. I didn’t know the songs anyway after being on my mission so long so it wasn’t a problem. BUT THEN…two weeks ago we were sitting in a house of a member and some songs came on right as we walked in and I just got the biggest knot in my stomach. I literally got a sick feeling. It hit me that in a few weeks that music will be allowed in my life again and it scared me to death. I hated that feeling. I realize that more and more things will start feeling that way for me and it makes me nervous. I got this though. No worries. I think..

Monday- After being sick for like a week I finally started feeling better. I can’t tell you how much I thanked Heavenly Father for that!!!!!!!!! I do not like being sick. Anyways. Ashley ended up texting us saying that her son all of the sudden decided he wants to take the lessons and get baptized. UHM. WHHHHHAAAAAA??? Then we go have a lesson with this family. It was the 1^st time we had met with the whole fam bam and it went AWESOME. The member we brought bore solid testimony and made connections with all of them, kids included. They were so into it. You could tell that the spirit was already testifying to them that it’s true. Ah :)

Tuesday- Had one of THE funniest missionary meetings I’ve had my whole mission. I felt bad because I knew the purpose wasn’t to laugh and goof off, but you get a few of these elders together and you can’t avoid it hahah. It was so funny that I ended up snorting SUPER loud hahaha. 

Freckles

We found out why one of the girls we are working with hasn’t been going to church. Her parents act like it’s fine until Sunday comes then they won’t let her. BUT: if it’s any other church she wants to go they let her. I just don’t get it. Sure, people don’t like Mormons and stuff but really? You’re not gunna let your 18 year old daughter who is probably in one of the hardest parts of her life go to church and strengthen her faith in Jesus Christ just because of that? Sounds ridiculous to me. 

Wednesday- did service at “Squash Farm” and got a little sunburned on my face :) have I told yall before that I love getting sunburned on the mission? I’m actually really serious hah. one of the members that feed us like every week here took us to get sushi!! AAAAAAAH! I’m pretty sure that was my first time on my mission. It was sooooo good. It made me happy. Also, I realized Heavenly Father was helping me out because while there “Rolling in the Deep” by Adele came on and instead of getting all panic attack, I had this happy thought like “Man, I can’t wait to ride in the car with Benny boy again and just BLAST this song like old times haha”. 

Thursday- Had our first lesson with Ashleys son and it went great. He is getting baptized in like a month. YAY :) it was really cute to see how excited Ashley was about it. See, it’s all about family in the gospel of Jesus Christ. Always has been, always will be. Sister B and I were sore all day and many more from all the working out we’d been doing. Hahah. Man. I love being sore. 

Friday- we didn’t see a text from our investigator cancelling our apt so we ended up going which was a miracle because we got to have the lesson and it went GREAT. We’d been praying all week about what member to take with us over there to give her a friend and last min He told us, she came and it was perfect. I love how much He knows His children :) while passing off some of our people we’re teaching to some elders they asked to say a prayer and started grabbing hands to hold during it…so yup….had to hold an elders hand again…..it sounds so middle school, (but you have to realize missionaries end up being super childlike by the time they get home :p) it was so uncomfortable.

Sister B and I both had to pee so badly this night that we had to pray not to wet our pants until we got to the nearest bathroom. Too funny. We have a good time. 

Saturday- WOMENS CONFERENCE WAS AWESOME. Boy, did I feel the spirit. 

https://www.lds.org/general-conference/music/2015/04?clang=eng&session=0&song=2&media=video#watch=video 

Mamu invited us to a birthday party at their home and we couldn’t pass that up :) at one point a napkin lit on fire and gave us all a scare. No worries though, the house still stands :p 

We share the same birthday!

 This day I realized how hard satan is working on me. We seriously had THE best week ever by this point. So many miracles that I don’t have time to explain were happening left and right and I was at the highest point of “having faith” that I think I’ve been at on my mission. BUT: at this point satan is doing whatever he can to get me down and he knows something that gets me discouraged and sad is by having people that I love and adore disappointed in me. I can’t get into details all I know is IT AIN’T FINNA WORK! I am not giving up. He knows that I’m not the least bit trunky (aka lazy and giving up on working) so he’s doing what he can to get me to give up. Nope. Not happenin. 

Sunday- Church was great. We had some people show up. One of our investigators has been SO excited about reading his Book of Mormon every night. It’s so precious. He’s like “grandma didn’t have to even remind me!” haha. Spoken like a true teenager :) I got really grossed out watching this newly wed couple all lovey dovey in Sunday school. Sister b kept laughing at me because she’d look over and see the disgust on my face. 

So, that’s about it.  LOVE YALL.

-hugs-

Sister Toolan

Random tulip in the desert!

Last transfer is in the books!

After finding out about transfers I am SUPER pumped. I get to stay in Village ward with Sister Brentlinger, I have AWESOME wardmates/zone leaders, I’m in a good zone, I don’t have to EVER worry about transfer calls again and life is just GOOD. This is going to be the best last transfer I could have ever asked for. 

Monday- Took some awesome zone pictures. I love awkwardness. Ha. I was really overwhelmed with how much Heavenly Father was proving His love for me this day. I tend to have a lot of those now. I love how clear it is to me at times that IIIIII was the one who needed to train Sister Brentlinger. So many things that I’ve grown from, learned a ton on and gained a testimony of are things that she struggles with. Even if THAT’s the only reason I struggled with things (even though I know it’s not), then THAT would be enough. He promised us all things would be for our gain and I’m seeing that more than ever now. 

Tuesday- I got through the day and that was enough for me. Man. I have NOT been sleeping good again lately. I literally laid in bed just thinking (SUPER FANGEROUS) til like 1 in the morning. Don’t worry, I still got up at 6:30 a.m. I made a goal at the start of my mission that I’d never sleep in and so far I’d stayed true to it. I only have 6 more weeks to endure. I GOT THIS. 

Wednesday- Felt like true stalkers this day as we convinced a little girl to give us her moms new number that we hadn’t been able to get. It worked like a gem. Hahah. That’s missionary life for ya. Also, that night a family in the ward threw me and their son (who have the same birthday) another surprise bday party haha. It was awesome. Totally unexpected. 

I got really excited for General Conference coming up this day. I love getting to hear from the prophet and apostles. It gives me a nice fresh view on what things I need to do better at.  I also love how easy it is for me to receive answers during that time. I want to challenge each of you reading this to 1. Watch conference if you weren’t already planning on it and 2. Going to conference with one or two questions that have been troubling your mind lately. Pray to God the whole time you’re watching it and listen for those answers :) 

Thursday- Heavenly Father prompted me to look over while we were driving and as a result saw that a potiental investigator that we haven’t been able to catch home the whole 5 ½ months I have been here WAS HOME! We taught her and she is now a new investigator :) 

 one of our investigators has been really sick lately and overwhelmed with life. I got sick of asking what we could do to help and just said very bluntly “look. We are coming over in an hour. We are going to help you clean, do laundry, straighten up, whatever needs to be done. See you soon.” And she let us!!! It was a powerful experience. It was then that I learned a valuable lesson. My whole mission I’ve heard if you’re tired just keep working and He’ll give you strength and I’ve seen it a few times, but nothing like today. The day before (and all this day) I was not feeling well at ALL, but we had so many important things to do/people to see so I knew I couldn’t go lay down a little (which was deff needed) plus because I’m reaching the end I don’t want to waste any time, I just wanna get out and work til I can’t work anymore. So I just prayed and told Heavenly Father He HAD to pull thru because my human strength was about to give out…AND HE DID. So much was accomplished it’s not even funny and I couldn’t have done it without Him. 

Friday- I got on a roof and fixed a few things. They don’t call me a handy man for nothing!!!! After the old man said we should take a picture…I agreed and got in position. Right before the camera went off he had grabbed me real low on my side (for any of you who don’t know, that’s a big nono for a missionary hahah) and Sister B caught the picture at perfect time. Look at that uncomfortableness. Beautiful. I don’t wish this upon any soul. Haha. 

I taught Sister B to be a little ghetto this night. I taught her the words “ER’BODY” and “finna”. She is making such progress :’) heheh

Saturday- had to go to another funeral for a man from the ward. That was hard. But I got to meet his deaf  brother with was awesome. We didn’t find out about transfers til 10:11p.m. it was awful. 

Sunday- I was sick as a dog all day. I had been since Wednesday. It was really rough. I’m still sick. We saw miracles, but I’m just glad this day is over with.

Wow. 6 more weeks. Crazy. I love yall. Don’t forget about womans conference this weekend!

-hugs-

Sister Toolan

Celebrating my 21st in the mission field!

Man. Another week down. GAAAAAH.

Monday- I treated myself for my birthday, like I did last year, and got my naiiiiiiils did! It felt so nice to sit in that little massage chair while it all happened. I need one of those in my apartment. Forreal. After working hard all day I’d say I deserve it :p We got to go visit one of our favorite older ladies who had just been admitted to the hospital and visiting her was hard. She looked so pitiful and helpless. It hit Sister B pretty hard, which I love, because that means she is learning to LOVE these people and feel for them which means she will be a GREAT missionary :) after, to boost our spirits a little we stopped by one of our favorite families house and while there they gave me an early birthday present. Mamu gave me the prettiest earrings. She is adorable. I mostly am in love with them because she put so much thought into it. Now I can never have an excuse to forget her :p

Tuesday- we had a mission wide fast this day and it was AWESOME! There’s something special about coming together, as children of God, who have SUCH differing opinions on everything, for a united purpose.
I had my very first standoff with a dog. I’m counting my blessings that it didn’t eat me. Sister B knows how to react to dogs (which was a miracle)  so she kept telling me “walk backwards (we were going DOWN a hill doing this hahah) and make eye contact with him. Don’t look away.” I was smiling and feelings so awkward and uncomfortable it wasn’t even funny haha. BUT WE ARE ALIVE:) We met some pretty cool people knockin’ doors out in the middle of literally NO WHERE.

Wednesday- MY BIRTHDAY. Holy smokes. I don’t even know where to start with this. It was such an incredibly busy and amazing day. There were countless people that helped make it SO special. I started by having ‘birthday pancakes’ at the Schreiners, had some awesome lessons, the STLS decorated our door with balloons and such, Chris and Ashley (with the help of my awesome momma) threw a surprise party for me with all of my favorites, had a nice birthday dinner with the Browns and sis Moffett had a little party as well. It was BUSY. I felt more love than I felt I deserved. This place has the best people. THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR ALL THE LETTERS/EMAILS/THOUGHTS/HELP. Yall are the greatest <3

Thursday- We had a lesson with a family we had met with on Tuesday night and something interesting happened. On Tuesday night both Sister B and I made a mistake by not inviting one of the guys into the lesson (like we know we should) and Heavenly Father made us very aware of this mistake when he came in himself and sat in without being asked. He ended up being more interested than them all. He gave a beautiful prayer at the end and committed to baptism. It gave me an opportunity to see change in myself though…I’ve learned something about the Atonement. After recognizing His way of telling us we had messed up, I didn’t dread coming home to repent, I didn’t sit there and beat myself up over the dumb mistake either. I was quite cheerful and positive excited that I could come home and be forgiven. I KNEW that because of Christ that this mistake wasn’t the end of the world (like us missionaries think at times) and that He’d remember it no more. I’m just grateful to see that HF has helped me learn more about the Atonement.

The cute little 8-12 year old girls in the ward had a dinner for us this night. They were the ‘servers’ and we had a great time. I was amazed at how wonderful they were. It was obvious that their parents teach them the gospel in their home. I want to do the same for my children some day.

Friday- Sister Cauble sent me THE greatest gift in the world. She is hilarious and knows me too well. I miss her. I miss all of my companions. Mamu fed us and was hilarious. She is one funny woman. She makes me happy I came on a mission. I wouldn’t have met great people like her any other way. How sad would that be?? When I get home remind me to do the impersonation of Elder Shumway doing an impersonation of me at the MTC, ok? Hahha. #priceless.
Exchanges were this night and Sister Fa’alolo and I stayed up waaaaaaaaaaaaay too late talking hahah.

Saturday- I got to see the temple president that sealed me and my family in July. That was a tender moment for both he and I. wow. I cried and cried. He said it was nice to see that that was still emotional for me, then he said “your time has to be coming to end???” and it hit. I have 7 weeks left. Ugh. THANKS haha.
We found 2 new investigators this day. People let us in that haven’t in a while. One of the guys we found literally reads the Book of Mormon every single day. Just doesn’t like church ahaha. Hopefully we can help him make those next steps.

Sunday- it was a very spiritual day. It was stake conference and I learned a ton. When I saw a man that used to live in the ward he goes “How much longer do you have?!?!” I said “I only have 7 more weeks….” His response was priceless: HEY! Only 7 more weeks and you get to kiss boys again!!!! Hahahahhahah. Man. Too great.
I struggled the last bit of the day. I think I’ve been trying to be so protective of Sis B that I’ve been keeping all my thoughts/concerns about going home in my head and finally after so many people bringing up me going home I busted. Thank goodness for the priesthood. I received a blessing and all is well. Just gotta keep on keepin on.

Think about this: learn to listen and listen to learn.
When you run track you don’t want to stop running hard and walk thru the finish line, you want to run THRU the finish line, pass the expectations. We, as children of God, need to shoot for above and beyond and in the process hit even more goals than we set for ourselves!!!

It was a great week. It usually is. Hardships and all. I love this work. I love Heavenly Fathers way of stretching us. I love that I can be forgiven and FEEL that sense of forgiveness from Him. Don’t get too excited about me coming home, I still have a good bit…or that’s what I like to tell myself at least ;p
-hugs-
Sister Toolan

LDS GANGSTAS

When you’re perfect, ya die and go home!

I feel bad because I’m sure most of you either a) just scroll through my post and look at all the ‘pretty pictures’ or b) start reading, get bored and stop reading before you even hit Tuesday. BUT! I’d have you know that my weeks always seem to start out slow and get better and better as they go…so you’re missin’ out! Haha.

Monday- This was deff a harder day for me than usual. For whatever reason as I was emailing everyone it hard core hit me that I come home soon. It hit that most everyone has changed. A lot. And it was brought to my attention again just how much I’m gunna have to adjust to being a normal person again. I’m over it already hahah. I drank my pain away with Raspberry Lemonade at dinner though, so all is well! I’m a SUCKER for raspberry lemonade. That was totally irrelevant, but oh well. Dinner was with someone who we haven’t seen in like 4 months, so it was time worth spent.

Tuesday- We had a special zone meeting so the zone leaders brought donuts, and since they KNOW I love donuts (apple fritters in specific) they bought one just for me:) so remember how last week I told you I hadn’t caved into my craving? I failed only one short day later hahah. #nowillpower

I realized that as a representative of Jesus Christ I need to be asking/expecting more miracles to take place. A lot of the times we aren’t given things we could have simply because we aren’t asking. If God is a God of miracles, why don’t we ask Him for more? Obviously or will has to be in line with His, but if it is we can expect AMAZING things.

Wednesday- GREAT DAY: it started off by having to go ‘down the hill’ for a meeting, so obviously we took the opportunity laid in front of us to go to ChickFilA and to invite Sister Cauble. That was probab;y the last time I’ll see her on my mission. Whaw. So sad. But it was a blast :) we are quite the crazies when we’re together. It’s weird to think we were only together 6 short weeks. We have SO many memories.

At our meeting president said a few things that were quotable.
*Us talking about our new missionaries stressing that they aren’t perfect at being missionaries “Tell them when you’re perfect, ya die and go home. So they need to be alright with not being perfect.” Hahah THEN! While some were saying they didn’t want their missions to end he goes “Look. We want you to go home. When you go home, go to school and get engag……….(long pause, awkward silence)engaged in life. We want you to get engaged in LIFE!” hahahha. Us poor missionaries.

We were at Jan’Ine and Des’Rays and I saw they had bought some Starbucks drinks to put in the fridge…well….since Des’Ray was on track to get baptized on Saturday I went into the kitchen, opened the fridge, stole the drinks and explained how she CAN’T drink it or she can’t get baptized. It sounds really crazy and dramatic, but it was hilarious. Jan’Ine kept saying “SHE GOT HOOD IN HER!!!! I TOLD YOU THAT GURL HAD HOOD IN HER! Stealin’ the coffee n-junk!!!!”

Thursday- I smelled like smoke all day from visiting lots of people who smoke in their homes. It gave me a headache :( BUT! We had a great lesson with one of our new investigators. She committed to baptism!!! She was so precious. While we were talking to her about Christ Atonement and how He suffered ALL manner of pain she started to cry and said “so you mean to tell me He knows how my leg feels right now??” How wonderful it was to say “YES! So He knows how to give you peace about it!” Man. Being a missionary is too great. She told us she loved us when we left. I love how fast you come to love people on your mission.

A hymn totally touched my heart in a way it never had before. I read the words to “Be Still My Soul” where it says “Be still my soul; thy God doth undertake to guide the future as He has the past.” And it hit that I truly have witnessed God guide me throughout my entire mission and I’ve gained a testimony of that. I believe it was to help comfort me for when I got home, so that I’ll remember He always led me and will continue to ‘in the future as He has the past.”

Friday- really the only thing important and big from this day was satan was working WAY hard on Des’Ray to stop her from getting baptized on Saturday. That was a very stressful moment for Sis Brentlinger and I. VERY. I had never seen someone be worked on so much right before baptism. And at one point he almost won, but since God will always over power satan she pressed forward which leads me to………….

Saturday- DES’RAY GOT BAPTIZED! Sis Van Heel got to come up for it, so yup, I got to see all 3 of my companions that are still in the mission all in one week! Pretty sick! The baptism was the most…interactive?...baptism I’ve ever been to in my life. It was a great experience and quite hilarious hahah. Des’Ray is awesome. I will quote Van Heel here “Chris double-dunked her just for fun. The thing about Village ward is everyone loves everyone regardless how crazy they can be at times.”

Sister Van Heel

ASHLEY WHITE MADE US A BOMB DINNER! Which was nice since we hadn’t eaten all day from being so busy hahah. I love this place. I love these people. I don’t really wanna go anywhere else.

SWEETEST THING! When we came home our door was decorated with balloons and such. A family in the ward knew I was going to get my nails done today for my birthday and wanted to get me a gift certificate before I went so they snuck over and went crazy on our door. So stinkkin’ sweet. I love this place.

Sunday- want to hear some of the awkward things people said to me this day. All of them were men.
-while talking about having ‘hot spouses’ someday…. “But NO ONES as hot as Sister Toolan!!!”….he’s….60???
-while talking to a really awk 18 year old boy..who IS a member and knows the limits...*DISCLAIMER: I’ve seriously talked to this kid like 3 times. * “Wow. That necklace is really awesome you’re wearing. It looks really cute on you…Hey, maybe you can hit me up on facebook after the mission??” Poor sister B during all this. She didn’t know how to respond, esp since she could see how awkward I felt hahahaha. Goodness.

We got a new investigator and committed him to baptism too! Man. Work is on fire here! Daylight savings is killin’ me though. You take a whole hour away from a missionaires sleep and it’s BRUTAL! Man. I will live. And I’ll sleep when I come home hahah.

I’ll end with a quote from church:
It’s better to prepare and prevent than it is to repair and repent.
I love yall. I can’t believe I turn 21 this week. I’m an old geezer by this point. Blah. BYEBYE
-hugs-
Sister Toolan

I Love Being A Missionary!

 My reasoning for coming out on a mission has changed so much since the beginning. I used to be here to be an example to my family, in specific, my brother, and to have a great experience. Now, I’m here because I love my Savior, I love His gospel and I love sharing this message.

Monday- I woke up feeling a little more rambunctious than usual and decided Sister B and I were going to Big Bear for the day! It had rained the whole night before so we got to see freshly fallen snow. Plus, it started snowing snowing on our way up. It was so beautiful. It was a once in a lifetime thing that ON pday, the day we can actually go up to Big Bear that it was snowing. One more great experience to add to my books :) AND. After 16 months of being on my mission I FINALLY purchased a “California shirt”! I love it.

Tuesday- Can I start by saying in the morning when we run here at this new place I struggle big time because it straight smells like a DOUGHNUT shop outside. It makes no sense for me to run off the food I ate the day before just to go inside we a hug doughnut craving hahaha. You’ll be happy to know I haven’t caved into the craving yet; not this transfer at least :p Went to Lucerne Valley for our missionary meeting, a ‘town full of character [s]”, as the sign coming in says hahaha. Interesting place, indeed.

We went to St. Marys Hospital to visit an elderly lady in our ward and had a great experience while there. She was in a condition where someone had to be watching her 24/7 and by the time we starting sharing our message of hope/happiness another nurse had come in to check on her. So 2 non member nurses sat in on our lesson, one even stayed although she didn’t have to. When we left, she came over and thanked us for the mission. Sure, we aren’t teaching her now or something and she isn’t getting baptized in a month, but she has had a positive experience with the church and missionaries so that now, when some come knockin’ on her door (cuz you know they will eventually hahah) she can let them in, listen to them, feel the same spirit she felt this day again and accept Jesus Christ church here on the earth. No effort ever goes wasted. Ever.

Wednesday- Sister B said something so wonderful speaking of the Hi-Desert “It’s such a pretty place!!!...in such an ugly way..” hahaha. Truer words have never been spoken. You really have to find beauty in this place. As much as I don’t look forward to having to come home, I DOOO look forward to seeing greenery again.

We stopped counting after hearing 9 sets of sirens going through town this day. The world is CRAY. I’m so thankful Heavenly Father protects His missionaries.

We had an investigator going to the Young Womans activity again so we went. It was a ‘Spa Night’. You better believe I was all up in it gettin’ my hair mask and stuff. I loved spending time with the youth. When I took my hair out of the towel after a little 6 year old said to me “Wow. Your hair is so sassy!” hahah

COOL MOMENT OF MY DAY! I found out that one of my all time favorite families from the Bear Valley ward I served in live in the Village ward boundaries until like the middle of may…right after I go home. My point? I can go visit/have dinner with them whenever I want now. Such a tender mercy. I had missed them.

Thursday- After like 3 transfers of trying to meet up with this one lady, we FINALLY did. She must have needed Sister B to teach her :) When we went she was so excited to have us and you could tell she was just thirsting for knowledge. Those are the best ones. They are so teachable. You could tell she had tons of questions and they were all questions that the gospel has perfect and complete answers for! I can’t wait to see what happens with her and her family.

Food for thought: the part of your brain that can reason and use good judgment is slower than the part of the brain that gets angry. So: STOP. BREATHE. THINK. Then SPEAK.
Just like learning a new language is hard, so is learning the language of the spirit. It takes time, patience, practice and trial/error; but eventually you get it down!

Friday- We asked some elders to help us do service at an elderly woman’s house and they weren’t too ‘excited’ I guess is the word. And it’s totally obvious when people don’t want to be where they are so because I didn’t want her to end up feeling bad for asking us to help we prayed before leaving that the elders would find joy in it, have good attitudes and be WILLING to help…guess what??? Not a single problem. All was well. And all we have to do sometimes is think to ask :)

Mamu (ma-moo), my little grandma I told you gave me a haircut last week, told me she is reading my blog now..so…MAMU, I LOVE YOU.  <3

Saturday- I woke up sick. If I don’t work out in the morning, then you know something’s work haha. I slept for a little and just prayed for help to get through the busy day. It was our 3^rd day in a row that we had back to back to back appointments. (blessings!!)
We were in serious #modelstatus all day from the amount of wind!!! We felt fabulous :p
During an appointment we were all asked if we could ask God 3 questions, what would they be? It took me a while, but this is what I came up with.

1.       Can I see a video of what my life would have been like had I not come on my mission? How much different would it have turned out had I not had this time of shaping?

2.       Why did you trust me so much/see so much strength in me to give me the trials you have/will continue to give? What made you think I could handle them and never allow them to get the best of me.

3.       What do YOU, God, look like when you are having to watch/hear me (or any one of His children, in general) struggle with life through prayer or lack of? What is your reaction? Do you cry with me? Does it break your heart. What. 

What would your 3 questions be???

Sunday- woke up and it was March already. What in the world?? Anywho, the best part of the day was when we were talking to this guy at church. He told us he was moving in a month and we asked why. His response? “To get out of Sodom and Gomorrah!” hahahahah. Nailed it.

We have another crazy busy week ahead of us. The best part though? I get to get Chickfila AND see Sister Cauble all in one setting! I’m grateful to be here in the Village ward. I am thankful Heavenly Father will take the burdens off our shoulders when we can carry it no further. I can’t believe I’m reaching that point where I don’t feel I need to add so much details to my blog because I’ll soon be able to just tell you these stories/miracles face to face. Be happy. Live the gospel and do it with a smile on your face. Love and miss you all.
-hugs-
Sister Toolan

Sister missionaries put sweet sticky notes on our door!